My boss is sabotaging my career path. What can I do?
You may have a job that you really enjoy or one where you get along with your coworkers. But what if your boss is sabotaging your career growth? Maybe you don’t want to quit and you want to continue to grow at that company, but your boss is holding you back.
Unfortunately, being sabotaged by a boss is common. We see this directly through our text line. The situation feels urgent, yet you feel like you’re stuck and like there’s nothing you can do. The good news is, there are steps you can take.
What is sabotage?
Sabotage is more than lack of support. When you’re being sabotaged, someone is actively undermining your performance or success. It may show up as a conflict between you and an individual coworker or boss. It can also be present as a feature of a workplace that fosters heavy competition between workers. It can come in many different forms, but they can all be harmful for your mental health.
A good boss will support you and your career path. They will support you wherever that path takes you, even if it’s at a different organization that better suits your needs. A bad boss might do the opposite and try to hold you back by actively undermining your work ethic or performance.
Sabotage at work can look like subtly cold comments, giving you impossible tasks, or undermining your work ethic. It can stem from many things — jealousy, being threatened by your hard work, they don’t want to lose you to another company, or they have something going on in their own life and they’re taking it out on you.
The bottom line is, sabotage from your boss is a reflection of their management, not of you or your work.
Signs you’re being sabotaged by your boss
So, how do you identify this behavior from your boss? Here are some signs that your boss is sabotaging your career growth:
Your boss is badmouthing you to others
Whether you’ve gotten a promotion, a new job, or you’re still growing in your current position, your boss should be supportive of you and your career. Through our text line, we’ve heard from workers who are either afraid that their boss will badmouth them to their coworkers, to their new boss, or to other higher-ups to sabotage their promotion.
As one Empower Work user shared:
“[My boss] randomly stopped at my new job one day without telling me … It actually put me in a very awkward position because … they just showed up and demanded to talk with the owners, only wanted to talk about me and then left. It was really weird for my new employers and felt like a huge boundary violation for me I feel like.”
Your boss is leaving you out
It never feels good to be “on the outs.” How can you expect to perform well at your job if your boss isn’t telling you where you could improve or where you may have made a mistake? Being left out could look like not being included in important meetings or conversations, ignoring you or your work, or isolating you from the rest of your coworkers.
As one Empower Work user shared:
“A coworker and the manager have been treating me very badly for months but it’s recently gotten a lot worse. They either completely ignore me (during every 10 hour shift with no breaks), make rude comments, or just flat out yell at me.”
Your boss is making you jump through hoops
Another way your boss may be sabotaging your career path is by making you jump through hoops or by overworking you. When your boss makes your job harder than it needs to be by giving you seemingly impossible tasks, it can make you feel and appear as if you’re not working as hard as you could. This can make you feel defeated and hopeless. Often, people feel that in this situation, their manager is trying to use their lack of hard work as an excuse to delay a promotion or to not give a good recommendation at their next job.
As an Empower Work user shared:
“[My boss] removed me of key responsibilities with no explanation and replaced a good portion of my job with trivial or unpleasant tasks … has given me unreasonable workloads or work demands and impossible deadlines, and she is withholding information from me that I need to be effective at work.”
Steps you can take to deal with sabotage from your boss.
Talk to your boss
If you feel comfortable enough to talk to your boss about how you’re feeling, this is a possible option. It’s common for people to feel that talking to their boss is like talking to a wall and that it isn’t worth it. This may be the case in some situations, but talking to your boss can be beneficial. Speaking to your boss in a non-confrontational way where you explain your perception and observations can help the situation. It’s likely your boss already knows of the conflict and will hopefully be more sensitive with you with future communication.
Control what’s within your control
It’s easy to feel like you have no control over this kind of situation, like there’s nothing you can do. Try to focus on what you can do right now. If talking to your boss or HR doesn’t seem like your best option, take a step back and think about small things you can do to feel more in control of the situation. This might look like talking to a friend or colleague, developing coping mechanisms at work, or practicing self care.
Consider your options and put yourself first
If you’ve talked to your boss or HR and you feel like it’s gotten you nowhere, it may be time to consider your options. It’s time to start asking yourself important questions in order to put your health and happiness first. For example, ask yourself: Is there a career path in this company? Is this job only a stepping stone to the next job? If your manager holds you back from growing professionally, how do you expect to grow within the company?
Keep a record
If you don’t know why your boss is sabotaging your career path, it may be helpful to keep a record of incidents. Write down notes, dates, names of witnesses, and keep emails. In some cases, sabotage at work can be delivered in a form of harassment or discrimination, so it’s important to keep a record of problematic incidents.
Reach Out
Talking to someone with a lending ear can help tremendously. Try talking to a friend or a colleague who might be in the same position. Someone who is neutral to your situation may offer a different perspective that you haven’t thought of. This is why we exist. When you reach out to 510-674-1414, our trained peer counselors are here to provide free, confidential work support. Reaching out to us, a friend, a family member, or a colleague is a strong and courageous step to take.
If you need further support
If your boss seems to be sabotaging your career growth, this can feel overwhelming, urgent, and isolating. Talking to your boss, controlling what’s within your control, keeping a record, putting yourself first, and reaching out are all possible routes to take when you’re feeling sabotaged by your boss.
If you need further guidance or support while figuring out next steps, our trained peer counselors are here to help. By texting 510-674-1414, you can chat with a peer counselor for free, confidential support.
Is your boss sabotaging your career path? Need support?
*Note: Empower Work provides non-legal support for workplace challenges. This information, while authoritative, is not legal advice or guaranteed for legality. Employment laws and regulations vary by state. We recommend consulting with state resources for specific interpretation and decisions. If you believe you were discriminated against in violation of the law, we recommend you seek legal advice.
